Becoming friends with uncertainty
“Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security.” ~John Allen Paulos
Uncertainty. No one knows what tomorrow will bring, the new roads that will unfold before us when we round the next corner on the journey through life.
I’m sure that most of us are dealing with uncertainty in one form or the other. But sometimes it can be really difficult to cope with it, although you try to keep a positive mind. So I thought I would share with you some of the useful tips I have in dealing with uncertainty in my life.
1. Let uncertainty become your friend.
The first thing you can do is to accept the feeling, and let uncertainty be your friend. Because the second you start fighting against the feeling and the fear of not being in control, your mind starts spinning and you paint all these nasty possible outcomes on the wall, it just gets worse and worse and soon your fear takes over. That's so unnecessary. It’s a waste of energy, bluntly said. So accept the feeling of uncertainty, observe it when it surfaces, and embrace the fear of not knowing, and it will surpass.
2. Keep an open mind and prepare yourself for different possibilities.
Be patient. The most difficult part of not knowing is the inability to plan and feel in control. Until it all becomes clearer, the best thing is to keep an open mind and heart for different possibilities. You may be so lucky that it turns out even better than you thought (according to my past experiences, it usually does anyways). So be flexible and keep your mind and heart open.
3. Be confident in coping and adapting your skills
When I feel fearful about the future, I usually try to ask myself “Ok, what’s the worst that could happen?” try to break it down how you would deal with it. Also knowing that what I fear the most, probably won’t happen anyway, usually brings comfort to my mind. And if it does, tell yourself. “I will be able to deal with whatever comes into my life” IF it comes… Trust yourself and your own abilities. You are stronger than you think. You can deal.
4. Use stress reduction techniques
When dealing with uncertainty, stress might build up in the body without you being completely aware of it (what I call inner stress) and affect blood pressure, blood sugar, breathing rate and every organ in the body. It can sometimes me difficult to know exactly how to deal with it but by being aware of your body and mind you may be able to help youself. When I am stressed, I usually try to go for a powerwalk, do and hour Pilates, yoga or meditate. It helps me to get rid of the stress that builds up in the body at times. So get active! Even practicing mindfulness, just 5-10 minutes at a time, helps. Download an app to your phone and incorporate it into your daily routine. Find your centre. Breathe and know that you can deal.
5. Focus on what you can control - and feel good
Sometimes we focus so much on the things we cannot control that we forget what we can control, such as taking care of our body, mind heart and soul by eating healthy foods, working out, practicing mindfulness techniques, positive thinking, affirmations and laughing! Trying to be present in every given moment. Focus on the small joys in your life, and don’t think too much. Try to feel more. Focus on feeling food. Hold it, breath and smile! Feel good
Know that whatever or whoever enters your life, it is an opportunity to enjoy and learn, both the good and the bad things we experience, teach us something, it makes us stronger and wiser and I believe, happier.
Today I choose to focus on the possibilities rather than the fear of the unknown - and I feel so much better!
